We are traveling!  Which means the tales of our adventures can be found here:  Cannon Family Travels.

We’ll post again here when we are back in KC!

(AKA if I run without my Garmin, does it still “count”?)

Although it doesn’t show in any of my running logs, I’ve been out for an early morning jaunt several times this week without watch or running app.  In the wake of reading the book “Born to Run”, I am intrigued by the notion of running for the joy of running without times to beat or miles to cover. (I am also intrigued by the running barefoot idea but that will have to come later.)  So I headed out each morning with no way to measure my accomplishment.  Granted, I’m running familiar routes so I have a general sense of how far but no measure of how fast.  I’m still trying to decide if it’s freeing to my runner’s soul or torment to my inner data geek.

So now to wax philosophical:  why do we keep track of so many things?  I wear my Fitbit everyday and note the number of steps I do (or mostly don’t) take yet I don’t change my behavior because of it.  I stopped using food logs because it’s too much of a hassle to figure out how many calories are in the “clean out the fridge” casseroles I make on a regular basis.  Does it matter?  Why can I ignore those tracking items and yet the lack of a running talley of running times is nagging at me.  Because for running, I have a notion of how fast or how far I “should” run and what I could accomplish if I “just” went a little farther or a little faster. Same thing with the scale – why do I care what the number looking back at me is? Because somewhere there a box on a chart that says how much I “should” weigh if I would “just” eat right.

And there is the heart of the matter:  the two most painful words in the English language (jokes about ridiculous business jargon aside) are “should” and “just” because they convey a value judgement in a seemingly objective word.  Why “should” I run at least 15 miles per week?  Eat no more than 2000 calories a day?  Walk 10,000 steps?  Who set these milestones and why do I buy into them?  Yes, there are some places where consequences result from not minding the markers:  consistently overeat and under-exercise and there are possible health implications.  But the implication that one could be different/better/thinner/happier if one “just” ran more, ate less, walked more, drank less, is a heinous and painful judgement.  “Just” implies an ease with which such things are rarely attained.  I have outright shunned the word in working with colleagues who ask a favor of me because it will “just” take a minute.  Maybe it will and maybe it won’t – you are minimizing the effect of your request (not the impact of your ask BTW) because it makes you feel less guilty that you are asking it of me.

So I’m reconsidering all the places where I take measures and imbue them with meaning.  I am trying to avoid the external cues where society (and my inner interpretation of it’s signals) tells me I “should” be able to have skinny thighs and flat abs if I “just” go to the gym more often (or fill in your favorite quick fix here).  Instead I’ll try to enjoy the moment that I am in rather than the one that I think I should be.  And I’ll try not to worry too much about the numbers – with one notable exception:  the traditional holiday step count.  We will be heading out vacation in a few weeks so these posts will be more frequent and filled with travel tales and Fitbit tallies.  Why do those numbers not bother me?  Because I don’t give them the same judgmental meaning – I am in awe when we hit a large number but don’t care when we do not.  And it leads to entertaining conversations with my friends and family for whom a holiday is two weeks of sun, sangria, swimming pools and sleep.  That has never been my favorite way to pass a fortnight – maybe a few days but certainly not a week or more.  But maybe I should be able to enjoy it if I just relaxed a little more and stopped counting things.